A Nonpartisan Joke
FINALLY, A NONPARTISAN JOKE THAT CAN BE ENJOYED BY EVERYONE AND IT IS
POLITICALLY CORRECT!!
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit
by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St.
Peter at the pearly gates.
"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems
there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these
parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you.
" "No problem, just let me in," says the man.
"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do
is > have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can
choose where to spend eternity."
"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.
"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down,
down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a
green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front
of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake
his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich
at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then
dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a
good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time
that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty
farewell and waves while the elevator rises...
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St.
Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit heaven." So, 24 hours
pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud
to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before
he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well
then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your
eternity."
The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never
have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I
would be better off in hell."
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to
hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a
barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends,
dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more
trash falls from above.
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. "I
don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there
was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank
champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland
full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning .
. . Today you voted."